new movie ranking system: how cute was the CGI wolf?
if it doesn’t have CGI wolves, that doesn’t mean it’s subject to other rating systems, that just means it fails
THOR: RAGNAROK – 5/5, perfect score
NARNIA: THE LION, THE WITCH, AND THE WARDROBE – 4.5/5, voiced by a dude who sounds really hot which gets a separate bonus, boosting the ranking by .5
TWILIGHT: THE LAST ONE – 5/5, their hands were giant
THE JUNGLE BOOK – 5/5. lots of personality. look pretty cartoony and not believable, but i like it.
INCEPTION. no wolves. 0/5. a disgrace of a movie.
The Wolf of Wall Street. 0/5 – Name was a misnomer, didn’t even have a wolf in it. A sham.
This is why Leonardo didn’t get an Oscar until The Revenant
Published
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